Loki Owes Me A New Planet

Dying was overrated. Lars Dickson found it peaceful, but boring. Surviving the apocalypse? Turns out that's mostly just annoying.

First, it was a reality-bending teenage wizard and magic gone wild. Lars, mysteriously immune and profoundly unfazed, mostly just wanted snacks but somehow ended the world-breaking tantrum and accidentally became Emperor of Las Vegas.

Then came the first Emperor problem: the wizard's leftover AI decided to achieve sentience and crash what was left of civilization's tech. Lars's immunity was useless against bad code, forcing him to rely on bickering nerds, his increasingly competent (and complicated) advisor Brenda, and possibly weaponized farts to debug reality itself.

Just when he thought things couldn't get stupider, actual gods showed up. Turns out, the whole Craptastrophe started because Loki pulled an interdimensional prank, and now Ragnarok might be on the menu. Lars has to team up with arrogant deities he can't stand, hunt the God of Mischief, and maybe patch up reality with cosmic duct tape, all while navigating the most awkward romantic relationship at the end of the world.

Join Emperor Lars Dickson - ruler of a shitty empire, connoisseur of dark humor and cheap whiskey, the universe's most reluctant hero - as he navigates escalating apocalypses with maximum sarcasm and minimal enthusiasm. Zero Fucks Given isn't just a title; it's the only way to survive when reality keeps shitting the bed.