Mamma Mia and Pass the Blame!: A (Wildly Inaccurate) Guide to Being Italian.

Being Italian
(Because Normal is Boring, and Pasta is Life)
Welcome to the land where time is optional, gestures are mandatory, and public phone calls are performance art. In this laugh-out-loud, espresso-fueled guide to all things Italian, we peel back the perfectly ironed layers of a culture that invented the Renaissance... and still can't stand in line.
From the operatic drama of bureaucracy to the sacred ritual of espresso (taken standing, with judgment), Being Italian is your passport to a nation that worships at the altar of food, fashion, and fierce opinions. Whether you're getting married, getting buried, or just trying to validate a train ticket, there's one thing you'll never do in Italy: go unnoticed.
With chapters on pasta politics, political chaos, nonna surveillance networks, and how to leave a party in six emotionally-charged phases, this book is your survival manual, love letter, and warning label-all in one stylish package.
So, grab a double espresso, kiss someone on both cheeks (or three if you're in confusion), and learn how to live, love, and loudly correct someone's pizza order like a true Italian.
Because in Italy, if you're not gesturing-are you even breathing?